Life is like a blog; everyone has the ability to write their own. However, we often forget this lesson and we do things that derail our own story and hurt others along the way.
We sometimes look at other people’s lives/blogs and wish that we could write for them. We either wish that we had what they have or that they could be more like us. But it is not our experience that someone else wants to live, they have their own blog/life to write. This does not mean that you cannot make appearances in their life/blog, or even play a critical role, but just remember to not take away their unique voice.
I know that giving up that control is hard. The closer you get to someone, the more you want to protect them and the more you want to share with them. Trusting that they want to share with you takes time and may even hurt a little along the way (no one is perfect, them or you). I know just how hard this is, because I am working on trying to write for myself, while giving up control and trying to only support instead of write for others.
It is crucial to understand this: Only write for someone else with their full permission. And even then, try to offer more of a supportive role and let them use their voice.
The other piece that can also derail us in our life/blog is forgetting to write. We either get overwhelmed with daily tasks, stresses, or lose our drive in some other manner. Maybe we let someone write/live for us because it is easier or we are scared. No matter the reason for your absence, make it a focus to write/live (even if it only for yourself). Without goals, without focus, and without you speaking up for yourself, your story will not be one that you control. Do you really want to live/blog someone else’s story?
Another crucial point: I am not recommending focusing solely on yourself. Inviting others to share in your story, to offer their commentary, and learn from their experience can add more growth than staying solo. Maybe even decide to start a blog/life where you co-write a story while still maintaining your own blog/life.
I know that this seems obvious and even a little preachy. But the fact is that I am writing this as a lesson I have had to learn, and one that I am reminding myself to follow. Sometimes we lose focus on what is important and how we affect those around us. We also forget that we have the chance to write for ourselves, and even share our triumphs and struggles, so that others may learn (or empathize) along the way.